Hoo boy. Where to begin?
Well, first off, I would like to say I am not an active watcher of anime. In fact, one could say that I hate anime, and that most anime I have seen has been garbage. Now, that's not to say that I think all anime is garbage, such as Studio Ghibli, Ghost in the Shell, Neon Genesis Evangelion (I LOVE Evangelion), and Cowboy Bebop for example, and I don't have anything personal against "superfans" of anime (also called otakus). It's just most anime I've seen has been either very dark, graphically violent and so edgy Trent Reznor would blush, overtly perverted, borderline porn with an unlikable male protagonist that constantly switches between wanting to be and being ashamed of being a pervert, or cutesy kid show-esque stuff that doesn't offend me but I don't like either. That may be generalization, but that's just all the anime I've seen (I've not seen Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, so I have no formal opinion on that). However, when even the biggest of otakus have to laugh and mock an incredibly terrible anime, that's when you've got my attention.
Enter Neo Yokio.
My mind was in a sort spiral as I was watching, so I'll try and summarize the plot to the best of my memory. Neo Yokio is about (indiscriminately googles synopsis) Kaz Kaan, a wealthy, sophisticated "magistocrat" (who is played by Jaden Smith. Good for him, I guess) and resident of Neo Yokio (an industrial/futuristic rendition of New York. Yeah, this is what we're dealing with here) who wants to distance himself from his demon-slaying past and focus on his average life with friends, at the expense of his aunt Agatha (played by Susan Sarandon). The first episode (and only one I watched) is basically a day in his life, where he mourns the death of his relatonship with some girl, gets into a fight with an preppy douchebag, and he has to prep himself for the big field hockey game with his best friends that night. Oh, and he also has to exorcise a demon that possessed a girl through the clothes she was wearing.
No, really.
Now, aside from the show essentially being made out of mostly Cliff Notes, this show is....truely an experience. Not a good one, but I honestly can't say it's bad. I can't even say it's middle of the road. I can ALMOST say it's The Room of anime. Almost, because while The Room was so over-the-top in its incompetence, the show's outrageousness is balanced out by absolutely painful cliches (kid has to leave behind his mystical past to live a normal life, and older relative keeps pushing him back into that life, he gets into a fight with his rival, who is better than him and an asshole). But not only that, the voice acting is another thing to point out. Now, mostly everyone gives an "eh" performance. They're okay, but nothing to write home about (though the writing takes some of that "eh" out, but we'll get to that later). But Jaden Smith. God, Jaden Smith is just absolutely terrible. 3/4th of the time you can't really even tell what emotion he is supposed to be conveying in his voice. Kaz will be ecstatic and smiling from ear to ear, but Jaden will just be speaking in his "signature" monotone voice, and it's just so baffling to witness that it's hilarious. For the writing, when it's not boring and unoriginal, it's...baffling, to say the least. I can't even describe most of the stuff because it makes no sense outside of context (and barely sense WITHIN context), but I will just say that Kaz finds a way to defeat a demon after having a conversation with an old man at his wife's grave about perfume. I'm dead serious. As for the animation, it's like an alien creature's idea of anime, seeming to have a few of the basics about anime down, but being almost oblivious to the rest of the principles. The animation is like a mix between early Pokemon, that mid-2000's cartoon Kappa Mikey (anyone remember that?), and someone's DeviantArt. In layman's terms, it looks like shit. Bad lipsync, boring, unoriginal, and not even stylized characters and scenery (except the underwater Neo Yokio, that was actually kind of cool looking), and laughable character movement.
So, to summarize, Neo Yokio is a thing. That's all I can say. It's a thing. I honestly can't say anything much about it because it's just that much of a puzzle. Some parts of the show seem like they're taking potshots at "popular" (lotta air quotes today) animes, and even some people will say that this is a parody of modern anime. But there's just so much other stuff in this show that makes it seem like it's serious and not just a satire. So, while it was certainly a "so-bad-it's-enjoyable" kind of deal, it's certainly not strong enough of a "so-bad-it's-enjoyable" kind of deal to make me come back for more episodes to laugh at it. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go take a cold shower.
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