Love ain't Easy

To my future spouse,

I recently watched the Netflix original series Easy and found it quite interesting. The show focuses on relationships between characters centered in Chicago. Easy episode is a stand alone where a few characters may cross over between episodes, but, in general, they are not connected. I found this to be an interesting premise, but what really grabbed my attention in the show was the in depth and out of the norm way it discussed relationships, both romantic and others.

The show covers a variety of topics: a dying sex life, a husband hiding his passion from his wife, a wife who cheats, a girlfriend fighting to be supportive, a couple seeking to make their relationship more interesting with a threesome, women struggling with aging, and many more topics. All of these stem from one major theme, though, relationships. I have long believed that relationships and characters are the most important parts of any story, so I especially enjoyed this show.

As you are my future spouse, I would like to point out a few important things I learned from Easy. First, being open and allowing your relationship to adapt and change is vitally important. People and the world around them are in constant flux, and expected relationships to not change as well is a set up for failure. I am quite certain I will be very different at the time you are reading this, and I imagine you have changed as well, so why expect relationships to not change. Secondly, in the show people often faced difficulty when they were not communicating. This is another must of our relationship. I often may come across as stubborn, pompous, or deaf to your comments. This is not often the case, but telling me and putting me back in my place is something you should not hesitate to do. I will not be offended. Finally, one thing I have seen in both my life and on Easy is that if a relationship is not working, it is okay to leave. As a child of divorce, I am well aware that sometimes situations and people change (as mentioned earlier), therefore it is okay if relationships end. I am not saying one should not try to save a relationship, but there is a point where there is too much that would have to change. I think these three things are vital to a relationship and I was pondering them while watching Easy.

The first episode of Easy follows a couple struggling to renew their long dying sex life. The couple’s story is renewed in the second season as well. Their story, though, discusses the things I mentioned earlier. First, the couple is open to change. In the second season they actually open their marriage; allowing for them to fulfill needs they no longer can together, and strengthen the areas of their relationship where they excel. While I am not personally a fan of open relationships, I find their ability to adapt their relationship to what they personally needed and felt comfortable with to be inspiring. Secondly, the couple was very good at communication. They were constantly in dialogue with one another, whether it be in counseling or in bed before going to sleep. While the couple never ended their relationship, they still meant the final point as well. This stems from they were aware and willing to adapt and fix the areas of the relationship that needed improvement. They were aware that their relationship could end, but instead decided it didn’t need to.

Overall I greatly enjoyed the Netflix original Easy. I hope that these qualities of a good relationship I picked up hold over time; I imagine they will. Also, future spouse, I hope we can watch this show together, so you can tell me what I missed and understand the things I learned from this show.